Sunday, October 3, 2010

Still the same, only stronger








As Brian Woods was being kept alive on life support in a hospital in Germany, Elizabeth wondered aloud: Without you, who am I?

This week, a little over a year after he died, I asked Elizabeth how she would answer the question now. This is what she said:


"I would probably define myself as a person who is now stronger than I ever thought I could be. I'm still the same woman that Brian knew and loved, but I also have a new level of wisdom about the fragility of life.

"I also don't get as upset about some of the "smaller" things in life anymore. I can always say, 'it could be worse.' It gives me a new perspective about not wasting too much time over issues that used to cause me more stress.


"I've also learned a lesson in how little control we have in life. We can choose how we react or respond to things, but we do not have a choice in how life unfolds in many cases. We have to learn to make the most out of what we have.


"I think that through Brian, I learned the important lesson of pushing forward and not giving up just because things get hard. I think I have always had that outlook, but through losing half of my family, I understand what it takes.


"I also look at my Ella and know that I want to provide the best life for her. She gives me such a strong drive and motivation to continue to make the most of life.

"I've also gained more confidence since Brian's passing. Because I've been forced to handle so much, it's given me a bit more of an edge, and I'm not fearful of much anymore. I used to be nervous speaking in front of people, but compared to losing a family member, it's a piece of cake. Things that used to seem like a big deal, just aren't anymore.

"So, I guess I would say that I'm still the same person, but more determined. I've always been a person who likes to be busy, and was always searching for a purpose. I feel that I've found it now ... to help other women through the path of widowhood."

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